Here is a picture for you:

I am sitting in the living room, typing this while people on the TV are talking about money and politics. The sun is out, it is a beutiful day. When I look outside and listen closely, I hear birds singing and I see the dogs playing with a blue toy. The colors and smells and noises are overwhelming. Nancy is talking on the phone, I guess it is Jas, who called.

I talked to Jas on the phone too. We talked about boys, weather, plans, yesterday and tomorrow. But the thing that became more and more clear in my mind was, that I have changed since last August. I think I grew up, Grew up a lot. Even though I didnt hang out with friends a lot, I got to now a lot of people and learned so much about them. And I learned about the person in me. I learned about this thing in me that tells me, honestly, what to do and how to do it right. It tells me who and what is important for me and my life. It even tells me why I shouldnt do the wrong thing again or try new things that are wrong.

And guess what! This thing is not just IN me, it IS me. And I feel good about me now, because I feel like I do the right thing. I am excited to go home, to see the boys, to hug my mom and dad, to listen to my sister and to talk some more to Jas. ( of course, she gets a big hug too ) :) .

And I will work hard not to go back to the ‘old’ maike, because I like me that way

I needed to write this down, to hold it in my mind, to tell me, and you, that this is right.

<3